For the longest time I wanted to be part of a coven. A group of friends all my own, they believed the things I did, they practiced the way I did. But most of all I wanted a group of friends that I could share my everyday life with that understood what I was doing. I often went to Pagans Night Out events in Houston and it was fun, I met a lot of people who were into all kinds of things but there was no sense of connection there.
When my husband and I moved to the Southwest, I decided to make the jump and try to find a coven. Not knowing anyone in town I thought it would be a great way of meeting people and making some lasting friendships. So my journey began, I started working the web for prospects. I found the Witches Voice site that actually has listing of covens by areas around the country and world. There were a few listings for the Albuquerque area but most were not taking new members. I did find one that was; I checked out their website, emailed them a note expressing my interest in their group. I received a phone call from the coordinator for the coven and we chatted for a long time about different things and how we were lead to the Wiccan Path. Before hanging up she invited me to join them for a meeting where they would explain the rules and expectations of the coven.
I went to meet the coven members on a Saturday morning, it was at a park by the river, now remember I am from the city. I am a city girl through and through. So this was kind of fun to be in this setting but I was apprehensive a bit. But, the meeting went well; I met the High Priestess and listened to their presentation. I felt that with my background in Wicca this was a perfect match. So I accepted the invitation to join the coven. I was invited to the initiation ceremony a few weeks later.
The initiation was held on a nice sunny morning along the river. It involved me, the High Priestess and the High Priest. Everyone else is left at the gathering spot until called upon. The initiation ceremony was nice and peaceful and a very spiritual experience. What is said at the initiation is only for those involved so I will leave it at that.
Our group met about once a month, for a potluck lunch and chatting, we would hold rituals if one was needed but mostly it was just chatting about what we did. This time was used to get to know the other members of the coven in a more informal setting.
If you are interested in a finding a coven here are some general guidelines.
1. Good covens are very close knit, sometimes closer than families.
2. Do not expect to be a full coven member right away; many wait a year and a day before you are a full member.
3. The decision to accept a new member is made by all coven members not just the High Priest or Priestess.
4. Most covens keep a very low profile and avoid loud and flashy people seeking to be members.
5. A coven should NEVER require anything sexual of a perspective member.
6. If you ever feel uncomfortable while interviewing or meeting with a coven listen to those feelings.
There are some things that each coven does that are different from others. Some covens hold ritual skyclad, which is naked. This is not meant to be sexual. To them it is removing anything material out of the way. Most coven practice in robes though to keep everyone comfortable. There are some sexual rites in witchcraft. They are not required of anyone. In fact only those who are in serious relationships should participate in them and only in the privacy of their own homes and it is never in the company of the coven or group.
If you are truly interested in finding a coven there are several ways to increase your chances of making a connection. Some newspapers have a religious section that covens will place advertisements in; Witches Voice website has listings as well. The best place to start is networking in your neighborhood; go to psychic fairs, renaissance festivals or metaphysical bookstores. Most metaphysical bookstores have a community bulletin board with events going on around town.
One way I just discovered to attract other Wiccans and Pagans is by advertising yourself as a witch. Now I am not talking about walking around town in a flowing cape, pointed hat and a broom. But try wearing a pentagram necklace; it tells others of your interests and they can approach you about it. Since I started wearing my pentagram in public I have had several people comment on my necklace, three people have told me that admire my bravery for wearing it in public. I am not being particularly brave just wearing something I enjoy. When they ask about it or comment on it and the place and time is okay, I ask them if they are Pagan or Wiccan. Some are and some do not know. But, chances are if they know what it is and do not accuse of you dancing with Satan they know about Wicca.
Just remember to always be open-minded when looking for a coven, there are several traditions and they all have their own sets of rules. You may be surprised when you hear some of them. If you ever feel threatened or afraid, walk away. It is not right for you. Never meet anyone alone; always make sure you tell someone where you are going. Use the same rules you would for meeting a date for the first time when you meet a coven for the first time and you will be okay.
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